Monthly Archives: August 2009

The Mystery behind a ‘Proposal’

A mystery that traps each one of us….at some or other time.

But most of the time we don’t have an answer to it.... and it remains as an unsolved Puzzle.

Read on… and try to solve this mystery. Good Luck !!


Cinderella-and-Prince-Charming-disney-couples

“Proposal”….did it hit a chord??? I am so sure it definitely did. Come on you are teenagers now don’t tell me you’ve never proposed or been proposed…if you haven’t then I’d suggest you ‘grow up’…

Like thousands of words ‘propose/proposal’ too is an ordinary word, but the feeling that it brings is extraordinary. It’s often heard in context to love, marriages, business deals and what not. It has some kind of importance and mystery behind it which made me to think about it in a detailed manner. The word ‘propose(v)’ according to the oxford dictionary means

1.    Put forward an idea for consideration
2.    Nominate for a post
3.    Make an offer of marriage to someone

At first sight it might seem to be just simple. Here we would be dealing with it from the angle of love/today’s youth.

You all must be having a doubt in mind as to why I am telling you about this. It is important to understand it and the way of dealing with it. Much of my own sweet and bitter experiences and few of my friends helped me to look more into it.

It’s the story of all of us. It’s a story of all that has happened in our life or will happen at later a stage. But we will definitely face it atleast once. Here are some facts from the boy’s point of view.

To start with, whenever we like someone or are fascinated by love (sometimes infatuation), we decide to make a proposal to that special person. We think of various ways to propose ranging from meeting them, calling them….to sending those cards/gifts/roses. This reminds of a beautiful title track from the movie ‘Mera Phela Phela Pyar(MP3)’ which perfectly suits this situation.

Our heart pumps with higher pace and brain loaded with all types of tricky questions and answers. I wonder why this doesn’t happen in our exams or in classes when the teacher is teaching us.

Whenever we are ready for the proposal – a fight starts between our heart and brain. Our heart says – “You like her, you love her, she too loves you, you need her, tell her….ask her”.

But our brain says – “Wait a little, know her more……what if she says NO, what if she doesn’t talk, what if she even goes away from you”. We are in state of dilemma, totally confused.

As soon as our heart wants us ‘to propose her’, this fight begins creating the most mysterious situation in our life yet the most exciting one. During this transition all sorts of unusual things happen – such as not able to concentrate on work, sleepless nights, daydreaming, etc….. she seems to be everywhere.

But our brain is much smarter. It keeps poking our heart with different tricks. This fight only ends second after the proposal has been made. This is the time to wait for an answer. This is the time when excitement and anxiousness is at its peak.

As soon as we get the answer all previous thoughts come to an end.

If the proposal is accepted, the world is ours. We are the happiest one.

And if it gets rejected we get tears and sadness. We don’t wish to talk to anyone and try to seek more justifications for being rejected. Our mind is flooded with many questions and we hate ourselves for making the proposal. Again, this force me tell you a healing song “Tune Jo Na Kaha” from the movie New York.

After this, we are left with only two options.

First, Counter-Proposal (revised proposal) the term I learnt in Legal Issues meaning proposing with modifications in a different manner. We try our best to pursue our loved one.

Second, some magical or super natural thing happens. After few hours/days/months she calls back and feels sorry. She accepts the proposal giving all sorts of convincing reasons like – I was not sure at that time, wanted to be single, had a boyfriend…etc.

If both of these options fail, we totally feel broken many of us even cry if we really felt for them. We start hating the word “proposal” which once used to be our favourite and bring a tremendous smile on our face.

But most of us try to convince ourselves “There would be someone else waiting for me, I just need to look for her”, bringing back hope and excitement.

Here I feel that girls should know what it takes to propose. It is one of the most difficult tasks for boys. They should support us by understanding our feelings, the best way accepting it. 🙂

Sometimes I wonder why B.Tech CSE students, like me study Software Engineering, we should rather be taught Proposal Engineering which would be more practical analysing all the processes and risk, it would be a lot more interesting too.

I however still stand in doubt whether to propose her or not. What reply I will get if I propose her. What if she says no….or should I still enjoy the time with her and watch the smile on her face and decide it later.

As I had mentioned before it’s a struggle, and my heart and mind are on it…still struggling still wondering still anticipating her answer… its a hard choice to be made but i ll wait for my answer…’for my calling'(as they say in supernatural a t.v. serial)… and of course the right time… till then it’s a long wait….

Written By:- Ankit Gogia

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I’ ll be waiting for your comments and answers to solve this mystery.

If you like it share it with your friends.

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